Staff Reports
The Democrat Party is having a meltdown of epic proportions. As Donald Trump continues to bask in the glow of a political victory that makes the previous three decades of the party’s antics look like warm-up acts, some Democrats seem to have taken leave of their senses. Instead of facing the truth, they’re opting for a steaming cup of denial and a side of hysteria, personified by none other than “Little Brian” Stelter. This so-called media analyst is still trying to convince America that decades of mismanagement, deception, and flat-out nonsense from his side of the aisle aren’t the real problem. No, it must be the fault of those nasty politicians who dare to challenge the gospel according to the Washington Post. Brilliant deductive reasoning there, Brian! For Pete’s sake, the only people still believing those tales are the ones who think the moon landing was faked and that pineapple belongs on pizza.
In a moment that’s somehow both ridiculous and tragically predictable, media outlets are throwing temper tantrums as they abandon Twitter—or is it X now?—like children fleeing a playground when the swings are full. Celebrities like Joy Reid and Don Lemon are packing up their virtual bags and heading to a place called Blue Sky, a platform so deserted that finding users there is like playing hide-and-seek with a ghost. Meanwhile, liberals who think they’ve found the secret to social media success seem to forget about Mark Zuckerberg’s Threads, which, if memory serves, was as popular as a vegan hotdog at a Texas barbecue. At this point, could they just make up their minds, please? It’s almost as if their entire existence relies on something other than good ideas.
And speaking of good ideas—or the lack thereof—the Democrat Party seems stuck on turbo-woke mode, barreling straight toward what can only be described as Woke 2.0. By now, a sane person might think that recent failures would inspire some humility or introspection among party members. Instead, they’re doubling down! Seriously, if you thought the last round of wokeness was cringe-worthy, wait until you see what they have planned next. While some voices within the party whisper of the need for change, others roar like wounded lions, affirming that they’ve not nearly gone far enough. Get ready for a barrage of blue hearts representing their unabashed embrace of policies that even the average Joe finds utterly confusing.
The war on gender and sports rages on as eager political warriors brandish their rhetoric like swords, but let’s face it: the only ones truly fighting here are those trying to maintain a semblance of normalcy. There aren’t armies of trans kids marching onto the basketball courts, but you wouldn’t know it from the ads flooding the airwaves. The media has practically invented a crisis out of thin air, and while it’s certainly entertaining, it makes one question whether the truth has become as obsolete as VHS tapes. It’s a good thing more people are tuning out the clamor of nightly news because they’ve finally seen the man behind the curtain, and the reveal is far from flattering.
Amidst this circus, Bill Maher, the unexpected voice of reason, seems to be waving a white flag of sanity, appealing for rationality within a party hell-bent on digging its grave deeper. When even Maher finds himself exasperated, it’s clear that something has gone awry. You have congressmen like Seth Molton articulating concerns that fall squarely into the “common sense” category, only to watch the fallout that goes along with even hinting at logic. His campaign manager bowed out faster than a magician’s rabbit, showing everyone just how batty things have gotten.
As if all that wasn’t enough to keep the proverbial pot boiling, some TikTok star thinks a solid plan for defeating Trump 2.0 involves simply ignoring him. Brilliant strategy there! Ignoring someone during their inauguration—the bipartisan celebration of democracy—will surely strike at the heart of one’s ego. Frankly, if you want to watch a missed opportunity in real-time, just turn on TikTok and soak in the cringe. So here we are in a world where the most pressing issues are exaggerated and politicized while the real world gives a collective sigh and splashes cold water on its face. If only the Democrats could take a page from their playbook and focus on a little soul-searching themselves; they might just unearth some long-lost common sense. But until then, let the hilarity of it all continue.
