Staff Reports
Hoo boy, buckle up patriots, because the leftists are at it again with their so-called “studies” and “research.” The latest one claims that Americans are getting wild and reckless on New Year’s Eve, engaging in unprotected hanky-panky at a higher rate than any other holiday. Can you believe the nerve of these liberals? They’re probably just trying to ruin the fun for everyone!
According to this so-called “scientific study” from Texas Tech University, revelers in the good ol’ US of A are apparently throwing caution to the wind and ditching the condoms on New Year’s Eve. They claim that there’s a 10% spike in sales of morning-after pills and emergency contraception after the big ball drops, as if that’s somehow something to be concerned about.
More careless boozy #NewYearsEve hookups are coming, a new study says: https://t.co/rjfB3uJqiM via @nypost #NewYear
— Jorge Fitz-Gibbon (@jfitzgibbon) December 22, 2023
The study goes on to say that Americans are less likely to use protection during drunken New Year’s Eve hook-ups, leading to panicked runs to the pharmacy for emergency contraception. Oh, the horror! The researchers claim there’s a 10% jump in unprotected shenanigans based on yearly patterns. They even tracked the sales of the morning-after pill and found a spike in purchases after New Year’s Eve. The nerve of these scientists, trying to rain on our parade!
The study even looked at sales of emergency contraception between 2016 and 2022 among women between the ages of 15 and 44. Apparently, there were about 41,000 more purchases of the morning-after pill in the days following New Year’s Eve. Can you believe the audacity of these so-called researchers, snooping around and keeping track of our personal choices?
But wait, it gets better! The researchers had the nerve to warn that this spike in sales is no laughing matter and calls for further attention. Please, give us a break! We don’t need the nanny state poking its nose into our bedrooms and lecturing us about “unmet contraceptive need.” Trust us, we can handle our own affairs just fine, thank you very much!
So there you have it, folks. The leftists are once again trying to make a mountain out of a molehill. Don’t let their fear-mongering and data-crunching ruin your New Year’s Eve festivities. Let freedom ring, and let the good times roll, with or without their silly studies!
