Staff Reports
Protesters learned hard lessons this week when their radical stunts backfired spectacularly. Chaos erupted at Columbia University as far-left activists barricaded themselves inside Butler Library, shouting anti-Israel slogans and harassing students trying to study. Police in riot gear swiftly cleared the occupation, dragging away screaming agitators who thought rules didn’t apply to them. Their embarrassing meltdowns went viral – nothing says “failed rebellion” like getting dragged across campus floors by your backpack straps.
Chicago streets turned into a circus during May Day marches as professional complainers demanded open borders and Hamas sympathy. Thousands blocked traffic waving signs attacking ICE while chanting slogans praising illegal immigration. Working-class commuters stared in disgust as these trust-fund protesters littered streets with Palestinian flags and communist symbols. Real Americans just want safe neighborhoods and gas prices under $5 – not this unhinged mob drama.
The funniest collapse came from blue-haired activists trying to “protest Trump” with cringey TikTok dances outside Mar-a-Lago. Their sad little rally drew more police officers than participants, ending when a sudden rainstorm sent them scrambling. Memes erupted showing soaked protesters slipping in mud – natural selection at work! Conservatives roasted them online: “Maybe try getting jobs instead?”
Eco-terrorists got a brutal reality check after glueing themselves to a Tesla factory entrance in California. Workers simply stepped over them while security hosed down the sticky fools with cold water. The clueless hippies forgot Tesla makes electric cars – their own “allies” laughed hardest at this epic fail. Nothing beats watching rich kids realize manual labor isn’t as easy as screaming at clouds.
Portland anarchists tried reviving 2020 riots but found zero public support this time. When they smashed Starbucks windows, bystanders tackled them before police arrived. Regular folks are done with this destruction – even liberal cities now cheer when antifa gets decked. The “revolution” died when moms started pepper-spraying looters in the cereal aisle.
Campus crybullies demanded “Zionists can’t sit with us” at UCLA – until football players moved their woke little “protest desks” into trash bins. Students applauded as these entitled brats got schooled in free speech. Universities finally waking up: whiny activists don’t get to ban people for having jobs or supporting America’s allies.
Climate clowns blocking highways met angry drivers who refused to play along. In Texas, a pickup truck slowly pushed their solar-panel float off the road as protesters dove into ditches. Viral video captions roasted them: “Don’t tread on me… unless you’re a F-150.” Real men don’t cower from Tonka trucks.
The week proved again that Americans reject this lunacy. While leftists tantrum in streets, patriots build businesses, raise families, and laugh at these trainwrecks. Freedom means letting fools embarrass themselves – then voting Trump 2024 to end the circus.
