Staff Reports
In a shocking turn of events, a white powdery substance believed to be cocaine was found at the White House after Hunter Biden paid a visit. Sources, who wish to remain anonymous for fear of liberal backlash, disclosed that the discovery took place in the White House library. We can only imagine Hunter doing some late-night “research” on the history of addiction while daddy Joe was out of town.
Was Hunter nearby? https://t.co/3gWIx1crUb
— Daily Caller (@DailyCaller) July 5, 2023
The substance, later confirmed to be cocaine, was discovered during a routine security check. Thankfully, the area was evacuated promptly to ensure everyone’s safety. The Washington, D.C. Fire Department, known for their swift action, determined that the powder was not a threat. So, breathe easy, folks. The only danger Hunter poses is to his own reputation, and indirectly, to the embattled Biden administration.
Cocaine found on White House premises, dispatch call shows… First son Hunter Biden, 53, who has acknowledged a prior addiction to crack cocaine, was on the White House grounds Friday before heading off to Camp David with his father for the holiday weekend https://t.co/57l9KR1cWU
— Miranda Devine (@mirandadevine) July 4, 2023
It should come as no surprise that the White House spokesperson, Anthony Guglielmi, downplayed the incident as a mere “unknown item.” But let’s call a spade a spade, shall we? It’s clear that the “unknown item” was Hunter’s stash of illegal narcotics. The fact that they had to send it for “further evaluation” shows the lengths they will go to protect their precious first son. We can only imagine what kind of shady deals were made behind the scenes to sweep this under the rug.
Of course, President Joe Biden conveniently avoided being present at the White House when his son’s cocaine habit was made public. It seems like daddy dearest has become quite the escape artist, evading any association with Hunter’s numerous scandals. It’s almost as if he’s afraid of being held accountable for his son’s actions. But hey, who needs responsibility when you have a “get out of jail free” card marked “Democrat”?
Let’s not forget, this isn’t the first time Hunter Biden’s drug addiction has made headlines. From crack addiction to illegal gun possession and tax evasion, it’s evident that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. It’s truly remarkable what privilege can afford a person these days. While law-abiding citizens would face serious consequences for such heinous crimes, Hunter Biden continues to roam free, propelled by his family name and political connections.
So, folks, buckle up. This is the America we live in today—an America where those in power can do as they please, while the rest of us are left to suffer the consequences of their actions. Hunter Biden may plead guilty to avoid prison time, but rest assured, he won’t be held accountable in the same way any ordinary citizen would be. The liberal elites will make sure of that.
