Climate Radicals Deface Stonehenge in Latest Desperate Stunt

Self-proclaimed climate warriors decided to desecrate one of the most iconic historical sites in the world this week. Stonehenge, the ancient monument that’s been standing tall for over 5,000 years, became the latest victim of the radical “Just Stop Oil” group’s desperate bid for attention. Maybe they think wrecking a cultural treasure will cool the planet or something.

Two members of the group, apparently taking their marching orders from an apocalyptic handbook, sprayed the stones with an orange substance. They announced this act of “eco-vandalism” as a demand for the U.K. to sign a pact to phase out fossil fuels by 2030. Because nothing says “save the environment” like defacing a historic treasure that has weathered millennia. 


Let’s talk transportation irony. These eco-warriors likely arrived at Stonehenge using some fossil fuel-powered means, just in time to spray their little orange tantrum. The group insists the substance was harmless cornflour and would wash away with rain. Apparently, they believe that cornflour is an acceptable medium for making their point, even if it’s on a monument that predates modern environmentalism by several thousand years. 

The two radicals were quickly apprehended by law enforcement on suspicion of damaging the ancient monument. This little stunt of theirs happened just a day before thousands were expected to visit Stonehenge for the summer solstice, proving once again that nothing is sacred to these climate crusaders—not even a site older than most civilizations. 


English Heritage, the charity devoted to preserving Stonehenge and other historic sites, confirmed the vandalism in their statement, noting the damage and expressing disturbance over the incident. Despite this childish act of protest, Stonehenge remains open to the public, although one must wonder how many ancient relics will need to suffer before common sense prevails over such fanatical behavior.

Written by Staff Reports

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